Learn Self Confidence and Gain Self Esteem

Dr. Purushothaman
October 11, 2013

What is self-confidence, and is it related to self-esteem? Self-confidence is an attitude that is characterized by a belief that one is in control of one's life and of one's plans. Self-esteem is respect for yourself, both of these go hand in hand, you cannot have one without the other.

Those people who have good self-esteem also have self-confidence, and the reverse is true; those who have self-confidence also have self-esteem. It seems that you must have one to have the other, yet you cannot get either unless you get one first. A catch 22, which can be a real problem to overcome.

Acknowledge your strengths

Gaining self-confidence can be acquired through sheer determination, knowing that what you are doing is right, and then proceeding to do it without relying on the approval of others. A few bouts of this soon lead to having self-esteem.

Ask yourself what skills you have, what abilities you have, and what do you like to do. Then combine them together into an activity. Go and perform this activity and soon you will find you have a level of confidence, and this in turn becomes self-esteem.

An example for you to use

Let us say for this article, that it is gardening. You are one of those people who can make a otherwise hopeless cause into a lush veranda of vegetation, so you garden without other peoples permission, without their guidance, and on your own ability. You find that other people compliment you on your fantastic garden; this improves your self-esteem, as any amount of respect from others will do wonders for your self-esteem.

With your confidence in your ability affirmed, you can literally grow more self-esteem. With greater self-esteem comes greater self-confidence, and the cycle repeats itself.

The pure of heart

People who are self-confident are those who recognize their capacity to do
Something, and then do it. They do not rely on the approval of other people in order to affirm their existence. In turn they also respect themselves, and this is what gives them good self-esteem. It is enough that they know they have the capacity and the potential to do something.

At the same time they have the ability to forgive themselves. Not everything goes according to plan, and mistakes are made. Some people call this failure and quit, this causes the opposite to happen, with loss of self-confidence and lowering of self-esteem.

When mistakes are made, learn from the mistake, change your actions accordingly and continue on with your goal. Have the confidence in yourself that you will finish, and accept that it will be a slightly different way than you originally thought.

Using the gardening example some more; you have a wonderful hanging plant, and it grows so well that it gets too heavy and breaks the rope that holds it. So you put it in a large pot on the corner instead. You still have a beautiful plant, just not in the way that you started to.

You can be what you want to be, and do what you want to do, if you look at all those words again, you will see it is a lot of you. So go be you, you cannot be someone else as they are already taken.


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