Mind Tools

Dr. Purushothaman
August 6, 2014

To keep the title of this writing brief, I left out one very important word: "Positive". Everyone has attitudes; we all have thoughts; we all have beliefs. But where do they land on the scale of negative to positive?

In any realm, whether it is school or job or relationships, our attitudes, thoughts and beliefs will determine the level of satisfaction, happiness, or success in those areas. And to go a little deeper- sometimes negativity in one area can spread into all the other areas, making it difficult to succeed anywhere.

We all come from different backgrounds and have different experiences. Some of us were really blessed and were given all the tools we would need for success from the time we were very young. Some of us were not so fortunate and have needed to work a little harder at it.

When it comes to Making Money Online, or any life endeavor, where we come from and how we think can have tremendous impact on our measure of success. Our beliefs alone can steer the course of an entire lifetime. It is my opinion that beliefs are the hardest to turn around, because one first has to have an experience that opposes that belief before we will question it. Sometimes that happens by chance and sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes our negative beliefs can be so ingrained we miss the opportunity to choose a different thought.

Perhaps this is not an issue everyone faces; but I know scores of people, myself included, that have really had to work hard at turning the negatives to positives. We really do create our own reality. We make statements to ourselves that can really limit our potential and thwart our success. Most of the time, we probably don't even realize we do it.

Some examples might be:

"I can't afford it"
"I am broke"
"I am never going to be able to retire"
"I am such a fool"
"I can't do that"
"I am never going to get ahead"
"I'll never get out of debt"
"I am stuck in this dead-end job"
"I can't seem to do anything right today"

I suspect one reason we can be drawn to the flashy, 'get rich quick' ad that we see on the internet is because it screams "YES YOU CAN!!!"- when we may have been telling ourselves we "can't". If we are really honest with ourselves, each of us has a reason, a prime motivator, for being urged in the direction of making money online. We are unsatisfied, unfulfilled or even extremely unhappy in our present circumstance.

So, what can we do? We can begin by turning our words around; take certain words out of our vocabulary; make positive statements out loud. If we can change the way we speak about a thing, we can change our thoughts about a thing. When we can change our thought patterns toward the positive, we begin to open ourselves to possibilities... and a possibility is certainly more positive.

Think about this: you are driving down the road at midnight and get thirsty for a coke and you pass a store but it is closed. You consider going a block out of your way to stop at another store, but the thought comes that this store is probably closed, too. Based on that one negative thought, you make a decision not to see if the store is open. You just tell yourself you can't have a coke because the store is closed. You tell yourself "No"... and that's the end of it. You might even get resentful that the store was closed.

So what happened here? One store was closed, so you THINK they are all closed, and now you have a resentful attitude about it. Without checking it out, you may form the belief that all stores are closed after midnight and be totally closed off from believing any store might be open. EVER.

While it's a silly example, it is sometimes true that one negative experience behind us can cause us to view scenarios in front of us as impossible situations.

Taking a more serious approach- lets say the company you work for shuts down and you lose your job of 23 years. This is devastating at best, and even though it may have been no fault of your own, you feel like a complete failure. Stop HERE. Feelings are not facts.

Start with a fact:
You didn't have 23 years at a job by being a complete failure. You were certainly a success for those 23 years.

It is important to start with a fact and stay with it and when a negative thought creeps in- turn it around. Ex: "I excelled in my job for 23 years and now it's time to do something different."

So, you find yourself surfing the net and you start to notice all the opportunities to make money online that are being advertised out there. Some are legitimate; some are not. You choose a method that seems appropriate and you get started on your $10,000.00/month home business opportunity. But it gets confusing and nothing seems to be happening. Here comes that feeling again...

It's time to bring some more facts into the situation or equation. For 23 years, you went to work everyday, you got good at your job, you got promoted and you got raises. When times got tough, you persevered and you didn't give up. When something wasn't working, you found another way to get the job done. It's no different here in the realm of Internet Marketing. It will take work and sometimes it will take perseverance. (One of the differences with internet opportunities is the massive exposure to millions of people and why things can happen so much faster, including the thought of giving up.)

So it will still take having a positive mindset and that will take maintenance. Developing and maintaining a positive attitude can be arduous at first, but by developing some good habits, it can be done. That's all negativity is really; just a bad habit.

One suggestion is to start each day in a quiet place and think of all you have to be grateful for. Make statements to yourself and to the universe that are positive affirmations. Ex: "I am a success and today I will take an action to promote my progress". Continue throughout the day to speak positive words with your mouth and be careful with your thoughts. Make a conscious effort to turn negative thoughts around, immediately!

Another thing we can do is: avoid negativity at all cost. If a friend needs to gossip, just walk away. Don't take it in and don't participate. If someone needs to criticize your choices in your life, whether it's whom you decide to marry or how you choose to make a living, find someone else to talk to and don't participate in their negativity.

"I am...", "I will...", and "I can..." statements are so powerful. We should be deliberate with them and use them to keep our thoughts, attitudes and beliefs in check. Even when we doubt, we can use them to affirm who we really are. We are all huge successes just waiting to be believed in, and that belief must come from within ourselves first.
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