The Top 4 Emotional Affair Signs

Dr. Purushothaman
January 13, 2014


Emotional affairs are just as damaging to a marriage as a physical affair with the exception that the signs of an emotional affair are much more subtle. This post will give you some insight into the 4 most common emotional affair signs so that you will know and understand what to look for if you suspect that your partner is having one.
"The other week while my husband was showering, I checked his phone," Julie confessed. "I've never done anything that before, but recently I noticed him getting lots of messages, both text and voice messages. I had a feeling that it had nothing to do with work. When I checked his messages, the same woman's name appeared over and over. What I saw got my blood boiling in seconds".
Can you relate to Julie's experience with her husband?
Regardless of whether it's text messages or emails, technological advances have made emotional affairs easier to get into and harder to spot in a marriage.
There's bound to be a feeling of inadequacy and resentment the moment you discover that your husband has developed a close emotional connection with someone other than yourself.
Emotional Affair Signs - How They Make You Feel
1. Guilt-You may feel a little guilty because you feel like you've broken your husband's trust by looking at his phone
2. Sadness - You're probably feeling sad since your husband is developing an emotional connection with someone else that's not you.
3. Anger - Your husband is neglecting you and what you need in your relationship but not this new person - their needs are being met and taken care of.
Top 4 Emotional Affair Signs
Marriages are founded on the emotional connections developed by those involved. If one person goes outside of the marriage trying to seek fulfillment - whether it be physical in nature or simply emotional - then trust has been broken and the seeds of an affair have been planted.
1. If your husband has developed a deep personal relationship with someone - he's crossed over into an emotional affair.
2. Sharing private thoughts - If your husband is sharing private and confidencial thoughts with anyone but you - this is a sign that he's involved in an emotional affair.
3. Hiding the relationship. Has your husband hidden the relationshp from you? Does he try and hide the text messages that he gets or does he openly and freely share them with you? Lastly, is his phone password protected and if so do you know what it is?
4. When you confront your husband about everything - does he marginalize your request and blow you off with a non-answer? If the answer is yes - it means that he feels guilty about hiding the relationship from you and that he's embarrassed about getting caught.
In most cases people who are caught have the same argument. They say something like "Why is it wrong to have a friend of the opposite sex?"
Your Next Move
If all the signs point to an emotional affair within your marriage then there is a good chance that you've had a lapse in intimacy so if you're looking for a starting point - start there.
If you can get your husband on board and get him to admit his emotional affair take it as a sign that he wants to work on your marriage and save it.
Changing the relationship that you and your husband have isn't going to happen overnight. It's going to take work and effort by both of you - but mostly him. If both of you are on the same page and want the same thing then your marriage will be eaiser to save.

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