Setting a goal without boundaries is like eating a massive bowl of chocolate ice cream without a spoon, you can get to the end but it’s going to get real messy! Boundaries provide the structure to hold focus. When one sets strong boundaries with a goal, they are making a bold commitment. They know what they want, and what they will and will not accept to achieve the ideal result. They are familiar with using courage, and have gained strength and self assurance. They become more authentic by providing structure to fully experience the vastness of their abilities. Sound appealing? Let us look at how to add boundaries around goals to improve your results.
Saying ‘absolutely yes’– Know what you are saying ‘absolutely yes’ to every day. What actions are you fully committing to? Leave no room for excuses. What positive thought patterns will support you as you move forward? Consider physical actions and those thought choices.
Saying ‘no’- Know when to say ‘no’. Sometimes that means saying ‘no’ to distractions, instant gratification, or to a friend, family member, or associate. Sometimes it means saying ‘no’ to allowing fear to hold you back any longer or a negative thought pattern that beats you up and holds you back from your greatest abilities. What can sabotage you from reaching your goal? Say ‘no’ to that!
Set limits to be unlimited- Setting limits is taking control of your time. Twenty-four hours is enough! Make good choices. Set the primary block of time on your calendar to take actions that embrace your goal. Limit time surfing the internet, handling e-mail, talking on the phone, watching tv, waiting in lines, wasting time, making numerous trips to the store, etc.
Gracefully set strong boundaries with others- Most are scared to set boundaries with others but they are so thrilled and self assured when they are courageous and get good at it! This is because when we do not set boundaries we are allowing others to have control in our lives. When you teach others what you will and will not accept you take control back in your life which is an act of self love and self respect.
Setting boundaries is best done with grace and without edge. The request is firm, and can be made compassionately and even while smiling with some. With other individuals be solidly firm but remain without anger or harshness in your voice.
Step 1- Inform them. Ex- I am working towards an important goal.
Step 2- Request they stop. Ex- I ask that you do not come into my office between 8am-10am.
Step 3- Demand they stop. Ex- You can not come into my office between 8am-10am.
Step 4-Walk away with grace. Or in this case…lock the door to your office (smile).
Others may find your boundaries annoying at first but likely will gain respect for you.
Establish boundaries that set the support structure in place to meet your goal face to face. In doing so, you are much more likely to experience the elation and fulfillment of an end result you can be excited about!
• Make your Absolutely Yes List- The shorter the better.
• What could sabotage you from reaching your goal? Say No to that!
• Block the important tasks first in your schedule. Set limits to support success of your goal.
• Is there someone you need to set boundaries with? Have the conversation.